Day 47 : Take Me For What I Am

Hello 365 Project, Blogger, and whoever is reading this,

Forgive me for making this post all about me, but I'm in the mood to be a bit selfish. Indulge me for this moment and let me share something with you. I claim to be a poet as well as a photographer. Yet lately the words have burned in my head and I haven't figured out why they are stuck. I can feel words caught in my hands, aching to be written, but the minute the pencil touches the paper I become lost. I don't know who I am anymore.

When I write poetry the world stops. It gets hard to breathe but I can't stop trying because as fearful as I am in that moment, I love it because my body feels so good in that struggle.

I am guilty of doubting myself. Maybe this is why I struggle so much. I don't believe in myself. It is one thing to know you are capable of accomplishing the world, but it is another actually believing you are capable of such a feat. I do not know how I am going to do this. Any of it.

"Take me for what I am. Who I was meant to be. And if you give a damn, take me, baby, or leave me."
- Take Me Or Leave Me from the musical "Rent"

F/5.0
1/100
ISO 200
Canon Rebel XTi

Day 46 : Shootout Saloon

This is one of my favorite moments of the Cultural Day event at Main Event. The Shootout Saloon. It is my favorite because my Canon 580EX flash set off ALL the sensors in this game! I got the biggest kick out of it and so did they.

I was asked to join the Intensive English students on their cultural day to photograph the event. The program needs more photos of the students, specifically, photos that are not "far-away-group-shots." I had more fun than I expected to have. I met some wonderful people and had some pretty incredible moments.

On the way to the event, I carpooled with several students. A Japanese student and I had a conversation on the way there. We both struggled to understand and be understood but it really gave me so much respect for him that he tried to figure out what I was asking him.

"Have you ever been to Main Event before?" I asked him. He didn't understand. OK.
"Have you ever been to the place we are going?" Sill nothing.
"Main Event, that place, have you gone there before?" ....
He answered that he had only been in Texas for 6 months, or something like that. Close enough. We all had a good laugh about it in the end.

Overall the day was fantastic. I had a blast taking the photos. I can only hope this is one of many experiences with these students I get.

Day 45 : Don't Eat The Berries

As pretty as they may be and as hungry as you may be, please, don't eat the berries.

Day 44 : Little Details of Tech

Another detail shot from my shoot. This was carved in the archway of the Mechanical Engineering building.

Forgive me, I'm still in the process of pulling photos from my camera from my awesome shoot Thursday afternoon at Main Event. Tonight I hope to post at least one!

Day 43 : Campus Archway

This is the entrance to the Civil Engineering Building at Texas Tech. When I walked by it I was awed at the curve of the arch, but also of the blue sky. The curve is accentuated by my wide angle lens but overall I just love the feel of this shot.

Today in Portfolio we went out as a class (all 5 of us) and took photos of the faces in the architecture. I shot this after class. The concept was to be 12 inches to 3 feet away. I was standing 12 inches from the arch and metered from, well, about 3 feet above me.

Texas Tech truly is a beautiful place to get an education.

Day 42 : Yet Another Day of Snow in Lubbock

I am so sick and tired of this crazy weather. It snowed AGAIN in Lubbock today. For my lunch hour I walked around campus, soaked my chucks, my jeans from the knee down and on my butt from this particular picture. Squatting in a puddle of ice water is not the most comfortable thing to do, unless you're a crazy photographer who really thinks a tuft of grass surrounded by snow is cool. Then it's OK.

Moral of this post is I am so incredibly, inexplicably, undeniably, understandably ready for spring to be here. Now.

Day 41 : Tractor Can't

While in Acuff, I hopped inside a broken tractor and snapped a few shots of the setting sun on the rusted machine. I will say that this was the very first time I have ever been inside of the cab of a tractor and I liked it. So many things to touch! Er... I mean, photograph....

=)

Day 40 : A Lick of Smoke

Late edit for catching up.

I took this the day I found out just how cool dry ice is. A-mazing. Truly is. Getting the smoke to pour out of the glass just right was the tricky part in shooting this.

Day 39 : Love

I love you. I just wanted you to know this.

Day 38 : Yellow Rose of Texas Tech

Geazul Hernandez is such a bright person. Everywhere she goes she lights up a room. Lucky for me, she also has tons of patience an humor and let me play with my new flash in the Language Learning Lab in the Foreign Language Building.

Right now I don't have a trigger but that is to be my next item to buy in order to fire the flash off camera. I can't wait though!!!!

Day 37 : Chelsea the Architect

Chelsea Serrano-Piche is an incredibly fun girl to be around. An architecture graduate student, Chelsea is ambitious, creative, and has the ability to bring laughter to everyone she meets.

I got my 580EX in the mail the other day and today read the manual. There is so many doors this opens for me and I cannot wait to see what adventures and photographs will come of it.
I shot a few with the flash and without the flash.

This shot was without. I like how dramatic the shadows are on her face. It has mystery and poses the question, "Just who is this, Chelsea?"

Day 36 : Church Crosses

Here is a late edit of the church crosses Rob found the day it snowed / rained / iced over in Lubbock.

It was soooo cold. This is one thing about being a photographer that sucks - you loose feeling in your fingers and hands when taking photos in the cold. Brrr!!!!!

Day 35 : Abandoned and Then Forgotten

BETTER TO ASK FOR FORGIVENESS THAN FOR PERMISSION

Every photographer should live by this philosophy. I do. Of course, there are always exceptions. Don't do anything that will get you killed, arrested or pregnant.

Walking through an abandoned-looking trailer, this detached barbie head looked so depressing laying between the bars of an old futon. I couldn't resist. The visit to Acuff was incredible and now I have some pretty incredible stories to share.

Day 34 : Tree of Life

When I saw this tree, I fell in love with it. On my visit to Acuff, Tx, after stomping through a harvested field of cotton toward an abandoned house, this lonely tree sat outside. Since the sky was clear, it was perfect for this photo since clouds would have been distracting.

Acuff is definitely a town I'm going to have to visit again and again.

Day 33 : A Dash of Pollen

I felt that, since it is Valentine's Day and all, I'd go with a flower shot. I've been wanting to play with my extension tubes and felt this was a good time to. This is a close up of one of the flowers that outlasted all the others from the bouquet I received on my birthday from my dear friend, Kyle.

Day 32 : Vintage Find

An adventure to Acuff, Tx lead to some amazing shots. This one stands out to me just because it is different. I spotted this beauty hiding behind a slab of granite and pulled it out, propped up up against this barrel and grabbed this shot.

This was ton's of fun. Also had dinner at an amazing Steakhouse. Everything was just incredible.
Thanks Rob, Simon, Lynsey, Allison, and Danielle for such a memorable adventure!

Day 31 : Brown Sugar Brownies

This was an idea suggested to me by my boss. Instead of using real sugar to make brownies, substitute it with brown sugar. Oh. My. Goodness. They were so delicious!

It was heaven in your mouth. A mixture between chocolate chip cookies and brownies. Now whenever I'm sitting there thinking "Do I want a cookie or a brownie?" I don't have to think for very long because these babies exist! It was such a joy!

Jana and I spent the evening making these delicious treats. I see future baking experiments for us. Now that I've spent the time writing about these scrumptious joys, I'm going to go have me another bite!

Day 30 : Stranger in the Snow

On my way walking to school this morning (yes walking, not riding my bike because it was too beautiful not to enjoy the weather) I stumbled upon this image. I don't know exactly why I love it so much but it moves me. The lone dark figure among all the snow. It's mysterious and exciting. Where is he going? He walks with cold purpose in a hurry, but where and why?

Frank Sinatra's "Strangers in the Night" is stuck in my head right now. The title is not appropriate for this post since it is not the night, but the morning. It is definitely in the snow, thus "Strangers in the snow."

"Strangers in the night exchanging glances
Wond'ring in the night what were the chances
We'd be sharing love before the night was through."

Day 29 : Pigeon Family

While walking home and thoroughly soaking my jeans from the knee down, I spotted a mama pigeon and her two chicks checking out the Lubbock scene from their home under the pedestrian bridge north of the stadium. The chicks are viciously ugly and the mom looks rabid, but it';s an endearing moment in my mind. I got this shot just before mama bird flew off when a truck honked and scared the life out of her and me.

Day 28 : You Got Served

Shooting for a project for my photo class on sports, I dragged David out of his study hole to play a game of racquetball with himself. After 5 minutes of running around the court, and me chasing him around the court with my camera, we both realized a very important thing : We are both out of shape. Oops!

This shot was obtained by crouching on the ground, underneath his serve. I love getting in weird spots/positions/moments. :p

Anywho, Thank you stranger Rec worker for letting us use a racquetball without purchase. I greatly appreciate it.

Day 27 : Chalky Fingers

This is my Economics Professor, Jean Cupidon. Honestly, this class is never boring because he has such a beautiful accent. He is from the French Caribbean and for the entire hour he talks about economics in that rich french accent, my brain is thinking in french. I'm crazy, I know. I should have finished that damn French minor, but c'est la vie. At this point I have run out of time. Merde.

My favorite part of class is watching to see how chalked up his hands get. I love it. I think it's the crazy artist in me that has developed a crush on those chalky fingers. That is why I wanted them to be the focus of this photo. Every single class period his right hand gets filthy. Too bad he hates getting his picture taken. *tear*

Day 26 : Hey Big Spender

I'm ready for my close up.

While trying to put together a "Villian" outfit from the items I have in my closet, I decided to try some closeups. With the help of Pixlr Editor, I came up with this as the result. So sue me if it's not my best work, I don't care, I was having fun. I love to play dress up and I LOVE my corset.

Until I receive my Canon 580ex in the mail, I've been shooting with available light. No biggy mostly, but I can't wait to play. I love being in the studio, I can only imagine the possibilities I'll get once I really learn how to work that baby!

Day 25 : Midnight Ice

These past few weeks in Lubbock have been absolutely crazy weather-wise. As I was leaving the Education building from taking my stupid test (I have no idea why I have to take this pointless class! EDIT 2318 - who the crap made this required? It's pointless, a waste of my time and money. I know I am not the only one thinking this.) So, as I was leaving from taking my test, I stumbled upon a pile of frozen snow that was still present after the recent snow/ice/rain freakout Lubbock had.

Lately I've felt so uninspired about this project. I've had a hater barking in my ear about how stupid this is, yet at the same time I've had so many people tell me they're enjoying it. I don't know what to do about it - thus the lag time in updates. I want to continue this project because it's something productive to do and it forces me to have my camera in my hands every day, or at least thinking about it every day.

Stupid haters hating on me. I know you're reading this too, and I know you've apologized, but I still had to vent.

Day 24 : Backstreet Boys

Cody and Tyler are with the Homeless Missionaries and they are amazing people. At the end of the NOH8 Campaign shoot, these two were ready to have fun! And they did. Honestly, I didn't have to give much direction at all to these guys, they had all the different poses in mind already. This they call the "Backstreet Boys Look." I love it when shoots go so smoothly.

Day 23 : Ice Queen Emerging

Recent photo, taken Jan 29th with Rob, and I just got to editing it. This is the only shot I was really happy with from this shoot. The crosses were wonderful, but that dang vase was so difficult to shoot! I was so frustrated with it by the end of the afternoon that I wanted to shove it in my closet and forget about it. Or as least, shove it away until I forgot about how much it frustrated me.

I like the way this image looks - mostly because the vase appears to be made of ice. Ice emerging from snow. Pretty freaky. If I saw an ice person coming out of the churchyard I'd run. Seriously. Ice people are not something you want to play around with.

Day 22 : Another Photographer

Oh Lynsey Jones.... she's one of my favorites. I have a lot of favorite people, but she really is.

Today in Senior Portfolio we went down into the studio and played around with the lights. I had a lot of fun. I love being in the studio. There is just so much that you can do, so many lightly setups. This particular shot was with one sidelight shot through an umbrella on a black background. I got a lot of good shots from this afternoon. This one stands out to me because for one, it's Lynsey, and two, it's just cool!

I love you, Lynsey. <3

Day 21 : Lubbock Pin

At work I found this pin lying around. I don't know where it came from, but I figured I'd play. Autumn was typing up student evaluation comments and I used her as my shoulder and hair model.

(FYI - comments that you write do get looked at and read and typed up. The TEACHER reads the comments, not the department, which means any gripes you have with the department should be given to the department, not the teacher. For goodness sakes, I am so tired of typing that shit. Oh and you don't have to say you learned a lot - you should, you're in college for crying out loud! What else are you here to do but to learn? Also, please stop drawing pictures. Comments are typed, not drawn, which means your teacher is never going to see that cartoon of a knight slaying a dragon and then drinking the dragon's blood. Sorry.)

Today's been a crazy day at work. Or maybe it's just all of the idiots out there trying to put in their two-cents worth. Venting.... sorry.

Day 20 : Intensive English Program

Today I was asked by the Foreign Languages Intensive English Program to take a group photograph. They had a lot of fun with the photo and this one was my favorite.

JUMP for IEP!